Joy! to the world!
The fucking-annoying-avalanche-o'-Christmastime-Jewelery-commercials begin--
Let Earth, explode so we don't have to hear them any longer!
Or so my lyrics go this morning. I swear to the Fucking Flying Spaghetti Monster, if I hear "Every Kiss Begins With Kay..." one more Spaghetti Monster time, I am climbing the tower. How is it possible to take an already horrible commercial idea, and take a huge, runny, bile-filled dump on it each year to make it worse, then (**** ALERT!!!! As I am typing this, mother fucker piss of shit Kay Jewelers just played that FUCKING commercial again. See? There is no escape. If I turn the TV off, I hear them on the radio. If I turn the radio off, some little elf dressed in Kay Jewelers attire comes to my door to recreate the commercials live for me. See?!!!) release these crap-filled pieces of commercial joy upon the viewing public for viewing NO LESS THAN 106,456,666,410,001 times during the Christmas season? I can only thank the Good Spaghetti Monster (ramen, brother... ramen) that the political season and the Christmas season never occur simultaneously. Can you fucking imagine?!
"Every Kiss Begins With Kay... --- And don't forget, that The Kiss of Death accompanies my opponent. He is evil. Don't vote for him. I approved this 3 ct pear-shaped diamond pendant available at Kay's for only $199, and this message."
They would probably have polling places AT Kay Jewelers for Spaghetti's sake! (****ALERT!!! Another Kay commercial as I type***).
Well FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOUUUUUUU KAY JEWELERS!!! I will NEVER buy anything from you because your ad campaign haunts me. Your cheap merchandise and high school production commercials truly suck ass.
Btw - As if the people receiving Kay Krap would be happy about this horrific gift anyway. They would probably wonder why hubby/wifey went so cheap, then wished hubby/wife would have been sucked in by the equally-annoying-with-just-as-much-air-time Lexus commercials instead. At least they would be getting a Lexus for having to suffer through such an experience.
This message has been brought to you by the letters K, and S, U, & X.
*** UPDATE ***
Oh, and FUCK YOU too Zales, Jarred, Charleston Alexander, The Jewery Factory, and 97.1!!!
The fucking-annoying-avalanche-o'-Christmastime-Jewelery-commercials begin--
Let Earth, explode so we don't have to hear them any longer!
Or so my lyrics go this morning. I swear to the Fucking Flying Spaghetti Monster, if I hear "Every Kiss Begins With Kay..." one more Spaghetti Monster time, I am climbing the tower. How is it possible to take an already horrible commercial idea, and take a huge, runny, bile-filled dump on it each year to make it worse, then (**** ALERT!!!! As I am typing this, mother fucker piss of shit Kay Jewelers just played that FUCKING commercial again. See? There is no escape. If I turn the TV off, I hear them on the radio. If I turn the radio off, some little elf dressed in Kay Jewelers attire comes to my door to recreate the commercials live for me. See?!!!) release these crap-filled pieces of commercial joy upon the viewing public for viewing NO LESS THAN 106,456,666,410,001 times during the Christmas season? I can only thank the Good Spaghetti Monster (ramen, brother... ramen) that the political season and the Christmas season never occur simultaneously. Can you fucking imagine?!
"Every Kiss Begins With Kay... --- And don't forget, that The Kiss of Death accompanies my opponent. He is evil. Don't vote for him. I approved this 3 ct pear-shaped diamond pendant available at Kay's for only $199, and this message."
They would probably have polling places AT Kay Jewelers for Spaghetti's sake! (****ALERT!!! Another Kay commercial as I type***).
Well FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOUUUUUUU KAY JEWELERS!!! I will NEVER buy anything from you because your ad campaign haunts me. Your cheap merchandise and high school production commercials truly suck ass.
Btw - As if the people receiving Kay Krap would be happy about this horrific gift anyway. They would probably wonder why hubby/wifey went so cheap, then wished hubby/wife would have been sucked in by the equally-annoying-with-just-as-much-air-time Lexus commercials instead. At least they would be getting a Lexus for having to suffer through such an experience.
This message has been brought to you by the letters K, and S, U, & X.
*** UPDATE ***
Oh, and FUCK YOU too Zales, Jarred, Charleston Alexander, The Jewery Factory, and 97.1!!!
posted by Lou Bricant at
5:06 AM
1 Comments:
it took me YEARS to 'get' that kay commercial. all of the sudden, one day, BAM! 'kiss' 'k' 'kay jewelers! when i stupidly admit this to my husband he was thrilled he 'got' something i didn't, for you see, i'm smart. so smart i made and cemented the kiss/sex/blowjob = jewelry link and never veered from that course :)
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